UFFDA! Podcast Ep
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[00:00:00] Welcome to the UFFDA! Podcast hosted by Emily O'Connor and Jordan Rudolph. The UFFDA! Podcast brings you a surprisingly fresh take on everyday topics in health, fitness and everything in between. We want to open the door to explore new information and new solutions in a way that's easy for you to understand and apply to your own life.
Let's get into today's episode.
Introduction
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Welcome back to the UFFDA! Podcast.
I'm Jordan Rudolph
and I'm Emily Morris. I'm going to say it correct this week.
We are back in our season four of the UFFDA! Podcast, episode 18, part two of our who, [00:01:00] not how with code name today, be, do, have.
Absolutely. We teased this last week, uh, in just kind of diving in to who we need to be is often more important than how we need to get there and really talking about kind of the underlying of that, where we.
Often we think about skipping to the end steps without doing everything that's required ahead of that to figure out who we need to be to get to where we want to go to have the things that we want to have. So today we are really going to dive in to the full exercise of Be, Do, Have and allow you the opportunity to kind of lay that out for yourself and self discover, if you will, who you want to be.
To get the things that you want to have as well.
And as just a reminder, you most, to get the most out of this, you will need [00:02:00] a paper and pen and pencil, any paper and pen and pencil. Um, because there's power, not only into writing things down, but for you to visually see this and bring it all together, to be honest, this is usually done with the visuals.
So we'll do our best to describe it. And, uh, if you have questions, send us a message, let us know how we can, how we can add more clarity to this for you. But um, maybe before we jump into the full blown be you have part of it, we recapped what we ended part one on with that visualization. Um, for those of you that listened to part one.
Um, we're just gonna, we're gonna quickly review what we, what like we ended on with the visualization stuff with the uh, king, queen, prince, princess, and then the villain. Um, so we'll go through that. For those of you that are listening to this and have never heard part one, listen to part one first. Have [00:03:00] to.
It goes in that order. Um, this won't be as impactful. or as useful if you do not do part one first. Today's episode will not be as impactful and as useful if you don't do part one first.
Correct. Right. So, pause this, go back, listen, kind of dive into part one, and then come back, dive into this. So, for those of you that did listen to part one last week, uh, and should be sitting in a space where you have something to write with, something to write on, uh, in a desk, we're just going to kind of dive into that visualization.
Visualization Recap from Last Week
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So, we're going to find space. Kind of shake it out, let go of the day if you will. Kind of center yourself getting ready to do this. Uh, take a few deep breaths if we need to. Just let your body come into that space first. From there, we're going to start with our king or queen. So we're going to add the queen.
Think of yourself as a king or a queen. Close your eyes if [00:04:00] we need to visualize this further. But how are you sitting in that chair? What chair are you sitting in? What does it look like?
You're going to ask for a cup of tea. How are you asking for that cup of tea? What is that cup of tea coming in? What is the glass or the cup that it's coming in? How are you interacting? Who's in that room with you as the king or the queen in that scenario?
So as those visualizations come true, just kind of feel that person out and feel who you are while you're being that person. And then you're going to do the exact same process if you were living and sitting in that same room, maybe a different room as a prince or a princess. What changes? If we ask you those same questions, what are you wearing?
What does your chair look like thrown? Where are you at in that room in relation to everybody else? How are you sitting? What is your posture like? Who's around you and ask for that same cup of tea. How are [00:05:00] you asking for that cup of tea as a prince or princess?
And we're pausing here to let you actually think about it because you need to.
And then that last little straw for this three part visualization is you as the villain. You're the bad guy. You're the bad woman. How are you dressed? What's your posture like? Who's around you? What kind of room are you in? Where are you situated in that room? What are you wearing? What's your posture? And how are you going to ask for your cup of tea?
If villains do such a thing.
So those three different visualizations. The king queen is one. The prince princess is two. The villain is three. All we, we, we asked you to take yourself, put yourself in those shoes. We asked you or we gave you instructions, if you will, or cues. [00:06:00] Uh, the same ones for each of those identities, but you clearly felt that you were living, breathing and behaving differently with each identity.
So the, the goal of that is to show you the power of, uh, Not just visualization, but like how you identify yourself in terms of what you believe in yourself and how you then act with that belief or with that identity. It's pretty powerful stuff. So we want to give you a moment just to make sure you're thinking about that and realizing that because this is usually a pretty, uh, eyeopening experience for a lot of people when they're like, Oh yeah, like I acted differently with all three of those things.
different visualization techniques or different figures.
And you might act the same in some areas of that as well, right? Like we might notice some similarities, but there's likely going to be differences in how you talked, how you sat, what you were [00:07:00] sitting in, how you interacted with the people around you, and all of those create that character of the person that we asked you to embody.
So as we kind of dive in then to you. We are often characters in our own story, and how we behave, how we act, determines often the outcome of that story. We're the author. So as we dive into this today, that can be an equally powerful realization and kind of self exploration, if you will, of learning how we might be behaving right now.
Is that moving the needle to where we need to go, or want to go, or is that not serving us as much as we thought it was and do we need to change, do we need to act, do we need to behave a little bit differently to get to where we want to go as well. So more about that self exploration of, of where we are, not necessarily good or bad, just recognizing the character that we're playing, so to speak.[00:08:00]
And which character you're showing up as. Mm
hmm.
So if we, if we have the ability to, if we know like our mind and our behaviors will follow what character we're playing. If you're not thinking that you're playing a character of your role in your day to day life and your health and fitness journey towards your goals, that's fine, but you're still representing somebody.
Like if we are casting you as you are right now in a movie, what would be the perfect role? How would we cast you if we make a movie about you? Who, who, who does that person represent and what is that movie going to show, right? We like when you build character development in movies, books, you, you show what that person is and what they are doing all the way around.
So if we give acknowledgement to that character that you're currently being, you can also have the opportunity to be somebody else, or this is the bigger one. You realize [00:09:00] that. The things that you're doing, and the things of how you're doing what you're doing, aren't matching up to who you want to be. So you're not living the character that you truly want to be.
There's stuff that's going on in your life that's conflicting, and basically it's those things, if you give it just that moment to think about it, you're like, gosh, I didn't intend to do that. Or, why am I doing this? This is not what I really want. And this is that opportunity, what we're about to do, That will take you to the places of who you really want.
Because we keep focusing, like we said last week, on the how. So let's become who we need to be. And then you're gonna have everything, basically, what you want. But, you'll start doing the things to get you closer to that. With intention.
Setting Up Be:Do > Have
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So, if you have that pen and paper in front of you, like you should, basically, we're gonna draw three rectangles or three boxes.
There's a left, a middle and a right, and they're all the same height. It doesn't [00:10:00] matter that you're just, you're just drawing three boxes, three circles, whatever. And this bar box to the far left, this is the first one we're going to start with.
Box #1: The Positives
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This is the current characteristics or traits or can we say strengths?
Yeah. I like strengths or any like.
The
positive. Yeah, usually you put a positive, you throw a positive at the top of the column. It's, it's things that you appreciate, enjoy, strengths about yourself.
Like your character.
Yep.
You, yourself. Typically we're gonna need about five. Three is not quite enough. Seven, eight is getting on the border of too many.
So typically about five. Um, but again, it's the, you as the character, the positive, the strengths, the things that, the traits, the characteristics of you that, that are good, that you love. Uh, so we're going to give you a moment to write those down and [00:11:00] be specific. You should, and you should also know these things.
And don't dread about what's next. Some of you are already thinking like, well, if we're gonna do the positive, I don't want to do the, I don't want to do the wait. No, no, Like it's coming. But you're gonna see that there's a spin to it. So just the positive right now. Please, just the positive. Write them in that box, put them in that circle, make that list.
And seriously, take the time to do this. We're not gonna pause for a couple minutes. Pause. We're gonna have you pause. Yeah. For a couple minutes before you start next. But Emma and I are going to keep going.
Right. So, pause this now. Write down your five when you have your five. Come back and restart.
Box #2: The Negatives
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In the next column, So that center middle column there, negative out the top, you're going to list the bottom, again, similar to our positives, 5 is the ideal number, 3 is not quite enough, [00:12:00] 7 plus gets to be too many.
So bottom 5 traits or characteristics of you that might not be the best. The things that you don't appreciate as much, the things that maybe, you know, you don't like as much. And again, as we kind of get into the negatives, another just reminder, we're not judging, we're not, you know, assigning blame or negative emotions to these.
We're just acknowledging them and bringing them out into the forefront so that we can then work with them so that we are aware of them. Often they lay below the surface and we ignore them or we don't think about it. Because it's good to focus on the positive, right? But we want to focus right here in this column on those bottom five more negative traits or characteristics of yourself.
And we know this is hard. Actually, this is probably easier for some people, um, because they only focus on, [00:13:00] like we talked about a few episodes ago, fears, frustrations, and all the things that piss them off about themselves. But this is hard for some people. Be thorough. Be real. No one's seeing this besides you unless you want us or to show somebody this like I show people mine I don't care I'll tell you guys about it if you ask But take the time to do it.
So pause and Then we'll be moving on to this third box all the way to the right but pause this right now fill out those five maybe top seven negative weakness you Characteristics.
Box #3: The Inverse of the Negatives
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And as we go to this last box, this one to the far right, here's essentially, well, before we even get there, what I want you to think of, I think I'm doing this in the right order, correct me if I'm wrong.
You're, you're correct. We're going to take that positive and that negative box, those characteristics that we just made for both, right, we have the positive and we have the negative, the left and the middle box. Those combined [00:14:00] are the current you. They're the you representing this, that you are listening this for the first time right now.
That is you as it exists in this very moment. In this next moment that we're about to go through, you will become a different person. Okay? So here's what we're gonna do. When we have who you are right now, we're gonna take only the middle box, only the middle, and you're gonna look at those words, And you are going to, in the third box, farthest to the right, that should be blank right now, that is an inverse box.
Okay, that means opposite, inverse. Okay, antonym. You are going to write the opposite word of the negative words that you put. So in that negative box, that middle box, that negative, quote, negative or weakness box, you are going to write the opposites in the third box, the one farthest to the right, for each word.
If two come up, that's okay. [00:15:00] But you're going to write the negative, uh, you're going to write the inverse of the negative. Okay, so take the time, hit pause, and write the inverse or the opposite of those negative words in that third box.
The Old Way of Being
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So now what we want you to do, we're going to go back to the first two boxes, the one that represents the current you. We want to look at just the negative words. All the words. All the words. Every single word on there. All 10 to 14, whatever you have on there. And what you're going to do is you're going to come up with one word that represents all of those.
Like, what's the word when you read all of those words? And sometimes I bias this, I focus on the negative. Um, but you're going to look at all of those words. What's the one word that comes to mind when you read all of those words? Hit pause. Look at all those words. The left box and the middle box. The old you box.
And we want you to come up with one word. Hit pause. [00:16:00] Come up with that word. And now that you've come up with that word, you're going to write your name after it. So you're going to have that word in front of your name. So it becomes blank Jordan. Blank Emily. That is the old you. Whatever that word is, that represents the old you.
And now I'll have Em take you through what you're going to do with the new you.
The New Way of Being
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So, once you have the old you, you're going to shift over to that far right box, so our now new you. Underneath that box, you're going to look at, similar to what we did on the last one, you're going to look at all five of those words.
So we're looking at just the right column, right, just the right box. We're going to find a word that summarizes all five of those or seven of those words. So wherever we are. There, what word comes to mind as you [00:17:00] read all of the words that are in that box? And you can hit pause, think on it, ponder.
When you come back, just like we did with the other two boxes, your old way of being, we are going to shift over, we are going to take that one word we just came up with and put our name after it. So, blank Emily, blank Jordan.
Summary of YOUR Way of Being
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Once you do that, you now have two avatars, or two characters. We have, in those first columns, your old way of being. And in the far column, we have our new way of being. We can think of these now as we lay them all out. We can take those positives from the far left column and combine them with our positives from the far right column.
We don't need to totally let go of our old way of being. But now that [00:18:00] we know what we don't necessarily like or aren't traits or characteristics pushing us closer to who we want to be, we now know the inverse. We have those there. So we can start recognizing and pulling in and acting as if we are. our new way of being.
So we now have, per you, we aren't talking about kings and queens, princes, princesses anymore. We have two characters. We have the old you, and we have the new you, labeled as whatever those two words are that you chose, as we went through and summarized everything in the boxes.
So when you catch yourself maybe not in alignment with what You want, or it feels like you're off, it feels like you're not in alignment with what your goals are, with what your intention is.
You can look back at this and kind of identify what character you're representing, what avatar you're representing. Our goal of this [00:19:00] is to, obviously, bank on the new character, the one on the right. And start representing and being that character more often than not, and putting this somewhere where you can focus on those five to seven words, whatever it is that represent that new character.
Talking About Emily & Jordan's Experience
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Um, when I did mine, I did it twice. I did it probably a week apart, two weeks apart. And I actually have to, I wanna do this again. I, I think the best recommendation might be doing it every six months and we're like, at the six month mark. Mm-Hmm. When we did it as a team. When we did it.
Yeah.
Uh, so I wanted to, I wanted to do that again, but ultimately, um.
My first word, I can't remember what I wrote down for my first old me, but I know I wrote down, um, Leader Jordan, and then when I did it again, I remember for sure I put Asshole Jordan, and then I put, um, Confident Jordan, I think. Otherwise the Confident and Leader thing are back, like they're flipped.
Either way, Confidence and Leadership were two things that really came to my mind when I read the transcript. [00:20:00] Characteristics of my new me, that second avatar. Um, the new avatar, if you will. But the, uh, I remember Asshole Jordan for sure was on there for me.
Right. There's that bias towards the negative,
right?
Which is okay, too. Um, I, my first one was just me, Emily, uh, in, as it existed in that current state. And then in no surprise to the listener, we did this separately. Uh, and I also chose leader Emily, uh, the first time I did it as well. I don't remember my second one. I would have to look it up. I remember. I don't remember the positive.
I think I kept me. But I don't remember. Oh
gosh.
I know I have it, but I took a picture of it and I can't search the picture.
It, it was, it was, it was good. It was different. Yeah. I don't remember. Yeah. It was different, but it was good. And I remember, uh, I don't think, I don't think Coach Ben did this twice.
Um, I don't think, but he, he had leader. Mm-Hmm. . [00:21:00] So it was cool that you, Ben and I all had leader Yeah. in our, and, and, and at some all separate shape. Heart. Yeah. And we didn't talk to each other. We didn't. We weren't saying, like, across the room, like, Hey, what are you, what are you putting down? We all put, we all put that as ours.
Putting BE:DO>HAVE into Action
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So, um, it's, it's bringing your, your, we talked about this in a couple episodes ago, about the fierce frustrations, wants and aspirations. This is how we bring that to life. This avatar that you created at the end with the inverse, that becomes the new you. That is essentially what you're aspiring to be. So what we want you to do is start focusing on those characteristics, those things, start living with those aspirations and start acting and behaving like that person would.
If you start acting, behaving like that person would with all those characteristics, how cool would that be to then bring that life around that person to life? [00:22:00] How fascinating would it be to see that person actually live a life that you're living in with those characteristics? What would change? What would be different?
What would you get done? What would you say yes to? What would you say no to? Ask yourself all those questions because you're already doing it anyway. And we just did a massive software update on your entire brain system right now. Massive. Like you are literally going to leave this podcast, turning it off here in a moment.
You should feel like a changed person. Like, when this went through and I did this twice, and I'll do it again, it literally felt like at my cellular level I was changing. And if you start living with those characteristics of that avatar, that knew you, you will start having more of what you want to have because you're doing more of what you're supposed to be doing, quote unquote.
Because you're being somebody who you want to be. That's Be, Do, Have.
Yep. Just a note to end on here. Well, maybe two notes to end on. One, [00:23:00] as we talk about changes, we talk about moving into this new person. always recognizing that who we were got us to the point where we're at right now. So it's not that we're dismissive, it's not that we're judging, it's not that we're bad previously and now we're good, but it got us to where we need to be.
So there's an element of gratitude there.
Finding Your Totem
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One thing you can also do, as a second note, is finding some sort of anchor or totem or physical representation of this new you, right? Similar to how we do in changes of, hey, remind yourself to do this, or maybe it's leave a post it note, or organizing your environment, like we've talked about in the past with other lifestyle changes.
having an anchor. Maybe it's something you do, something you wear, something you have that reminds you of this new you. That every time you do that, you are stepping into the new you, where it doesn't just become something that you're thinking about or acting on, but it's actually an action that you take or a thing that always reminds [00:24:00] you of the new you to bring in those characteristics into the physical as well.
So just two, two kind of notes to end on. One, one of gratitude, one of, more action implementation as you're just thinking about it and it will help keep that new you top of mind.
Yes, two two very two very very very important things within that um, and your totem can change You just have to know what it represents or what you do So like mine went from my wristband to my wedding ring to now I just rub my forefinger and my thumb together that's that's my That's my moment to kind of take the breath and think about what would confident or what would leader jordan do
You Yeah, super easy.
Mine for, it's always been like tying my shoes. Like when I did this I recognized that I was just like slipping on my shoes and they were already pre tied and This specifically states to my work shoes, because I have other ones that are pre tied. So, just a small caveat. But when I step in, when I want to be [00:25:00] that person to the fullest degree, that is my anchor each morning when I come in and put on my shoes.
I untie them, I re tie them, even if I had slipped them off the day before. So that's always my, like, little reset in the morning. So, it can be, it can be anything. It can be physical, it can be an action. But something to remind you of.
The new you.
As always, thank you guys so much for tuning into this week's episode of the UFFDA! Podcast.
Share this with someone who you think will find it valuable, leave us a rating, a review, subscribe, download all the things that help us to grow organically, and we'll catch you in the next episode. Bye everybody.
Thanks everyone.
